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Nowhere Near Perfect

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This weekend at home was honestly much needed and pretty awesome.  Call me crazy, but I love hanging out with my mom 🙂

She made me yummy food like fish tacos.  Seriously, these are so so so good…don’t worry, I asked her for the recipe.

We ate baby tomatoes from her garden.

 

We went running on Sunday morning.

 

I prepped my food for the week.  The tofu is covered with the same stuff used for the tilapia fish tacos.  It tastes good on the tofu, but better on the tilapia.

 

More food prepping…

 

Mom made another delicious dinner.  This time, it was grilled shrimp served on top of a giant salad.

 

Perfection

 

I had a pretty big revelation this weekend.  Mom and I had a big talk after dinner about my life, and the perfection I was striving for.

Recently, I have been trying too hard to be perfect…at everything…and I was literally driving myself crazy because it is impossible to be perfect.

I joined the Savage girls thinking that would make my eating habits perfect and my body perfect, when all it really did for me was add this unbearable stress all the time because I am not perfect…in fact I am no where near it.

I tried to keep up this perfect image on the blog, only showcasing the great workouts I did and the healthy meals I ate, not truly talking about my feelings or the days when all I wanted was a giant bowl of ice cream.   I wasn’t being real, and I wasn’t being me.

Working on the cruise taught me a lot of things in regards to healthy eating, healthy living, the environment, and how the chemicals in our world are affecting our bodies.  While working on the cruise, one of the things that I would do was educate others on this “clean living, detoxification, no impurities” lifestyle.  Because I was educating them on this perfect way to live, I wanted to be exemplary and not hypocritical so I tried to lead this “perfect” lifestyle, when really it was probably the farthest thing from perfect that I have ever experienced.  When I came home and tried to control things and be even more perfect, I feel like things spiraled out of control.

When I think about the people that I truly look up to, whether they are fitness instructors, bloggers, or whatever…the reason that I look up to them is because they do what they do well, but they are authentic.  They let people inside to see the real them and all of the flaws included, and although I aspire to be like these people…showcasing my flaws was the last thing that I ever wanted to do.

When I was in Body Pump training, we had to write down what we loved about our favorite instructors.  Without a hitch, without a second thought, the first thing that I wrote down was that I like to see them make mistakes.  Now, that doesn’t mean I want my instructors to flub the whole class, but to hear them accidentally cue “squat for 2/2….actually I mean super slow!” is refreshing to me….because I know that person is real and human…just like me.

I have been working so hard to do everything 100%, do everything perfect, and it was turning me into a robot.  What kind of a life is that?  I wasn’t enjoying time with friends, I wasn’t just sitting back and relaxing, I wasn’t ever taking a night off, I wasn’t living my life…and that takes a lot of work.

So, from here on out I want to be true to you, true to my group fitness classes, true to my family, true to Brian, true to my friends and be the real ME!  The real me is someone who loves to eat healthy, try new recipes and workouts, who loves ice cream and chocolate, who loves to bake for EVERYONE whenever there is an opportunity, who hopes to inspire others to try a new vegetable or workout for an extra 30 minutes.

Now, this doesn’t mean that I am going to go and eat a big old McDonald’s hamburger with all the toppings, a large fry, soda, and a chocolate milkshake on the side…because that is not me either.  But, if a friend calls me up and asks to meet up for ice cream or a drink, I am not going to stress because it wasn’t in the “plan.”  I am going to be so happy to see that friend and truly enjoy my time with him or her.

It is crazy how it suddenly hit me last night, but I am so HAPPY that I finally realized what was wrong in my life.  A saying that I heard once that will always stick with me is “Everything in moderation, including moderation”  Hello!  How brilliant is that?!  Thank you to whoever came up with that, because I need  a little moderation on my “moderation.”

So, here is to Monday and starting off the week on a new foot.  Boy, does that feel good!

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19 responses »

  1. Tara I am so happy for you! I think everyone can relate to your feelings and you are brave to post them on the blog. I honestly think that keeping a blog that makes you sound ‘perfect’ intimidates readers!! I know that everyone will relate to you more and love you for your imperfections because we all have them! xoxox Way to go!!!

    Reply
  2. your mom is VERY wise!! 🙂

    Reply
  3. I read this somewhere and loved it…made me feel better about not being perfect: Something like this: “It’s all a part of the plan. It’s impractical to think we can eat/workout perfectly. So build it in that we won’t be perfect and then it’s a part of the plan. It’s not a “cheat” because you’ve already planned for it. So you go out drinking with friends on the weekends. Is that cheating? Are you happy? Are you healthy? Are you achieving your goals? If the answers are “yes”, then it just sounds to me like everything’s going according to plan.”

    Thanks for your post!

    Reply
  4. Bravo Tara! You are awesome to share your feelings. As Sara has said….your mom is VERY WISE and I definitely agree! Now you have given yourself permission to be your best without being perfect!! 🙂

    Reply
  5. I loved everything about this post. From the amazing food to you finally finding you and realizing that it’s okay not to be perfect and it’s okay to go out and have fun, and know that it’s all about moderation. I, and so many others I’m sure can relate to exactly what you said. I admire how open the whole post was. Thank you.. it was just what I myself needed to hear and read.

    Reply
  6. im trying the same stuff!

    Reply
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  8. I try to eat perfectly, then I eat three doughnuts… Totally know how you feel (to a certain extent). It’s never good to plan too precisely!

    Reply
  9. Life’s definitely shipped enough things in my direction that I’ve found two mantras to take to heart: 1) Be fluid; water can sit happy in a bowl forever, but just as quickly flow away when the time comes. 2) Enjoy the little things; even when something goes bad, there’s a spark of good to be found in the occurrence.

    I do enjoy reading your blog from time to time, Tara, and haven’t commented, only observed. But I absolutely think you’ve been on the right track for a while, just you needed this “stop and look at the stars” moment that you had to really reflect on all that you are doing – and doing well, I must add – and that is terrific! More people should do the same!

    On a side note: I look forward to more breakfast ideas! I will have later morning courses this semester that will let me night-owl and still wake up with time for making something healthy and tasty (and eschew the toaster pastries).

    Take care!

    Reply
  10. I’m totally late to the party (I am so behind on reading blogs!) but I agree with everything you said. I like to see people who are real and read blogs by people who like chocolate and cookies after their nice healthy meal… I’m not perfect and I think it’s easy enough for people to pretend to be on the internet because you only have to post what you want to. I’m so happy you’ve had this revelation. 🙂 I used to think my workouts or food had to be all or nothing to succeed but it really doesn’t have to be that way at all!

    Reply
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